40 Days of Inner Voice – Day 16
THE NEW REGULAR ENTRY
Now that the inner voice has requested daily entries that are primarily back and forth conversations with, it? Them? We shall do that.
Maybe sometimes I'll write in this section what the mind is thinking about or what went on this particular day, for context and fun?
I had planned on working more on a program that I'm developing for this May, but then I was wide awake at 3am and couldn't get back to sleep. So I got up and did what I felt guided to do. And then I was guided to go back to bed at 5:30 or so, then didn't get up until 8am. I've felt foggy all day because of it. I had also planned to go for a hike this morning, but then that no longer felt correct.
Instead of doing what was planned, I felt drawn to multiple walks (I have a new step goal suggested to me and felt aligned with it since even before it was given to me I had been walking twice a day–which I adore doing in the spring/summer/autumn), meal prepping, cleaning, took a bath, made some progress on some courses/programs I'm doing, messaged with one of my clients that has between-session support, and that's about it. Oh and some Friday Hour Done type things.
Time to go in.
Do you want me to send the message I wrote at 3am?
What if it isn't well received?
How is it ok?
What does salt have to do with this?
Why do I need to create contrast or flavor?
Oh, so that's just what it would be if it isn't well received?
I feel like it's better to lay low and not potentially rock the boat though, what do you think about that?
What isn't the truth?
I'd be withholding my truth?
But wouldn't that be better than rocking the boat?
No, that rocks it
So there's potential boat rocking either way, so why not just say what. I want to say?
When should I edit and send it?
In the middle of writing this?
Ok, I'll be right back…
Ok, I did it. I don't like how this feels.
Go into it
I don't even know what the feeling is exactly. Do I need to?
Why do I have to get so hot in my cheeks, neck, and chest?
But I am trying to feel it… is it trapped from right now?
Is it trapped from the past?
Are you sure everything will be ok?
It's always all ok, always
It doesn't seem like that. There are terrible things that happen in the world…
Ok, the heat has gone down a bit, but there's also this knot in my stomach and now I'm just going to be distracted the rest of the day and weekend probably.
How do I let go?
Walks, other focuses
What should I focus on?
The things you're doing when doing them
Is there anything else I'm meant to focus my attention on?
We've already shown you
Won't that be working too much? What if I overwork myself?
What does that mean? No work? It isn't work?
Why do I think it's work then?
Ok, typical. Is anything work, really?
Do I need to be worried about how much I work?
But I'm a Projector and they say we aren't meant to work a lot, right?
You won't if there's no such thing as work
Touché… Do I need to ask about anything else today?
What do you want me to ask about?
I've already asked you about many of them. I don't know if there are any others right now. I guess the only thing I can think of isn't really an anxiety but is a continuation of our conversation from yesterday. The Knowing I had this morning, was that a Knowing or was that just obvious from the context clues?
To which one?
Does it matter which one it is?
So both count?
Do I need to worry about how it happens?
Ok, I can't think of anything else to add today.
Money Received: $0.00
Money Invested: $3.33