The Ease of Hustle Podcast
45. Entering In & Human Design with Lauren Armstrong
But was it even meant for you in the first place? You can decide to end the shame guilt spiral. Look at it as if it was the correct tactic or process for you to use in the first place.
Join me and my Human Design Coach, Lauren Armstrong, on the podcast today, where we share a great conversation about all things Human Design and consistency. Lauren and I discuss how we can use the action of being consistent against ourselves, what Human Design is, and what it looks like to enter into things using your body versus your mind. We also provide many examples of how we've used Human Design in our lives and businesses.
What You'll Learn From This Episode:
- Who Lauren Armstrong is and her work with Human Design
- How we tend to use consistency against ourselves
- What the emotional guidance scale is and how it works
- How to allow any emotion, negative or positive, to flow through us
- An example from Lauren Armstrong on how she was forcing consistency in her marketing
- Lauren's story on how she found Human Design
- What it looks like to make decisions with your authority versus your mind
- How to start using your authority to make decisions
- Examples of how we've made decisions using our authorities
- How consistency can look different to each Human Design type
- How being consistent may change for you over a week, month, year, or ten years
Listen to the Full Episode:
45. Entering In & Human Design with Lauren Armstrong
Featured On The Show:
- Connect with me on Instagram: @thelaurencash
- Lauren Armstrong Website | Instagram | Purpose without Pressure
- Emotional Guidance Scale
- Abraham Hicks
- Super Attractor* by Gabby Bernstein
- Human Design
- International Human Design School
- The 25 Year Framework* by Dan Sullivan
- Rest* by Alex Soojung-Kim Pang
Full Episode Transcript:
Welcome to The Ease of Hustle. I'm Lauren Cash. I'm a master certified coach, calendar queen, and multiple six-figure digital business owner. I adore helping you create goals your mind never thought were an option by blending together spirituality, mindset coaching, minimalism, and psychology. If you're looking to go from procrastinating perfectionist to easeful entrepreneur, this is the podcast that is meant for you. Thanks for being here. Now, let's get to the show.
Today, we dive in and geek out about Human Design consistency, how you enter into things basically your decision making and how to make decisions from the body in your authority rather than from the mind and just a little bit of how we've experienced that and some examples for you. Chatting with my Human Design Coach, Lauren Armstrong. I hope you enjoy our chat. Let's dive in.
Lauren: Hey, everyone. I'm so excited to have my Human Design Coach, Lauren Armstrong on the podcast today. Lauren, do you want to tell us a little bit about yourself?
Lauren A: I'm so excited. Yay. Yeah, so I'm Lauren Armstrong obviously. I help coaches and course creators really step into their unapologetic version of themselves so that they can stop feeling pressured to do business the way that everybody else is doing it. There's so many coaches and course creators out there that are brilliant, and they have these like purpose-driven missions that they want to bring to the world but so often where we put ourselves in these boxes if, “I have to do it this way” or “I should do it this way” because it's the way that your coach does it or that's the way that somebody in the industry does it, and they tell you that the only way that you need to do something in order to be successful.
And so, what Human Design really does for me and for my clients is to say, “Okay. Well, this is how you are uniquely wired energetically, and this is how you interact with the world, and here's how you step into your genius, and it's not the same way that I step into my genius.” It's not the way Lauren steps into her genius, and it's not the way that your coach steps into their genius. It's your unique blueprint to what works for you. And so, I just love being able to help people step into stopping doing all the crap that doesn't serve them.
Lauren: Oh my gosh. Yes, and the main topic that I wanted to have Lauren on to talk about is consistency which I think ties in beautifully to what you just talked about, about what you do because consistency is one of these buzzwords, especially in the coaching personal help community. That is one of those boxes that I think people put themselves into or they make the assumption, like you just said, like, “I need to do these things because that's what my coach does. That's what I see so and so do on Instagram.” And then, I need to do that thing consistently. And maybe, that thing wasn't even meant for them or for like what they were supposed to be doing that's more in alignment with their energetics, and for them. And then, they're also layering on this like should of consistency on top of that when the first thing wasn't even for them to begin with.
Lauren A: Yes. It's like my entire take on consistency in that sentence that you just said. You're choosing to do actions that aren't actually aligned for you because you saw somebody else doing them, and you were told that they're going to work. And then, you're going to do them consistently. And then, because they're not aligned for you, they don't actually work. And then, you tell yourself, “It's because you're not being consistent enough.”
And then, you put yourself in this shame guilt spiral of “I'm not doing the thing that's going to make me…”, whatever the end result is that you're looking for. And then, it's just the energetics of that are so wonky because then you're in shame-guilt spiral of low-frequency energy. And where you want to be is either feeling successful, satisfied, delighted, at peace, and those are all high energetic frequencies. So, you're out of alignment. And when I say alignment, I just mean your frequency is off. So, yes.
Lauren: Do you want to say a little bit more about what even frequency means and what it means for it to be off and what that might even look like?
Lauren A: Yes, so if you've ever heard of the emotional guidance scale. I think it's an Abraham Hicks' original concept, but I actually read about it for the first time in Gabby Bernstein's book, Super Attractor, or maybe one of her earlier ones. I don't remember. But Gabby Bernstein introduced it to me. But essentially what it is, is the emotional guidance skill which basically says that the emotions that you're feeling in your body all have a frequency or an energetic vibration associated to them. So, there's a scale that ranges from jealousy, anger, hopelessness, boredom, and it kind of goes up the scale with how you're feeling in your body is resonating at a certain frequency.
And as you raise your vibration or your emotions, your frequency raises, right? So, if you're satisfied, if you're successful, if you're joyful, that's all has a higher energetic frequency or vibration than something like anger. And so, what's really cool about that is if we say, “Okay. So, that's what frequency is, and that's what vibration is,” and according to the law of vibration, what you vibrate at you receive more of.
So, when you're vibrating at shame and guilt, you're receiving more opportunities to feel shameful and guilty versus when you're vibrating at success and joy, and even money has the vibration. When you're vibrating at those vibrations, you're attracting more to you. I know a lot of people associate the Law of Attraction, a lot of vibration with all of the woo-woo things. But it's scientifically proven. This is a frequency. It matches the frequency. We are all energetic beings. We call to us what we vibrate at.
Lauren: And I think a lot of people when they learn that though, they use it against themselves because they're like, “Oh, my gosh.” Now, I'm not especially my perfectionistic tendency minds that listen to the podcast will be like, “Oh, my gosh. Now, I'm in shame-guilt spiral.” And then, they shame-guilt themselves. And then, it's this compounding thing, and it's like, “Well, if you were just able to notice that and accept where you were at on the spectrum, then that in and of itself will get you out of the level or the vibration frequency that you're at right there.” What else do you see with people using that against themselves, and what helps to get out of that?
Lauren A: Yeah, the one you said is huge. It's like, “Oh, shoot. I can't…” and a lot of the stuff with Law of Attraction, law of vibration that people think like, “I can never ever feel another negative thought ever again because then I'm going to attract more of that to me,” and they talk themselves out of feeling their feelings. There's a fine line there, right? We are not robots. We are human beings. We have the full spectrum of emotions, and we are designed, we are allowed, we are meant to have emotions flow through us.
And if we don't let those emotions flow through us, what do we do? We hold on to them. We stuff them down, and then, they're trapped in our bodies. So, it's important to, okay, yes you know this. But how do you experience it? It's allowing yourself to experience the full range of emotions, and then, notice, “Okay, oh that's so interesting. I'm really upset right now or I'm really shaming myself and guilting myself. I'm going to let myself feel that. What does that feel like in my body? Can I let it move through me? Can I release it? Can I cry it out, right?” Whatever you need to do from the body perspective. And then, say, “Okay, do I need to still feel this way?”
Is this necessary or am I just noticing that, and like, “Oh, okay. I don't need this. I can move up that ladder.” And it doesn't necessarily mean that you need to go from shame and guilt all the way up to extreme joy like a static joy. That's a huge leap. So, where can you kind of climb up the ladder of like, “Okay, I'm noticing that. Okay. Maybe, now I'm just bored or maybe now I'm just like…”, right? So, you can kind of go up the ladder in that way and not yet, like you said, use it against yourself.
Lauren: Yeah, and I think a lot of times that's what's happening with the whole consistency thing and using that against ourselves too. We then are making it mean there's something wrong with us, and we go into this guilt-shame spiral. And then, we don't want to feel and process those emotions. And instead of feeling and processing those emotions which is what the actual “problem” is that needs to be resolved, we then just put our attention on like, “I just need to figure out how to get more consistent rather than just processing. I feel terrible because I'm making this whatever the “inconsistency” was.”
It probably wasn't even true that it wasn't consistent. But okay, we made a decision to do a thing that maybe wasn't in alignment for us and our energy and meant for us. We have that. Then, we have the, “Now I'm going to be consistent with it.” And then, I notice a time when maybe my mind thinks that it's inconsistent. And then, I'm going to beat myself up for that. And in order to not deal with that or the emotions coming up for me, then I'm going to escape that by then going back to trying to be consistent with it through action and force and buying another course about how to be more consistent with your Instagram posts.
I know you had mentioned one time when we were on a clubhouse. I don't know if you totally told the full story. But I wonder if you have a story about you had said you had been trying to do your marketing in a specific way and kind of forcing consistency or doing it more in another design. Can you tell kind of that story and what happened?
Lauren A: Yeah, fun. So, before I found Human Design which is the most beautiful, wonderful magical tool ever. If you don't know yours, please look it up. But before I found Human Design, I was really doing business coaching and coaching from a place of like, “Okay, I'm going to follow what everyone says that I need to do.” I'm going to buy a course. So, I bought a very well-known course, and it was all about launching, and there were three phases of launching. There's the runway and then the launch and then the post-launch, right?
And so, this is a 90 to 120-day process that you are building to launch something. And I'd start doing it. And then, I would just have no energy to keep doing it. And then, I'd get excited about something else. But I tell myself, “Oh, I can't talk about that because it's not in my launch plan. And this is the thing that I need to do in order to be successful.” And so, I'm putting myself in this box to do the thing that someone else told me to do because it worked for them.
And then, when it wasn't working for me, and it's not because I wasn't doing it. I was doing it. I was forcing myself to do it. I was doing it, and it wasn't working for me. And instead of being like, “Oh, this program might not be the right fit,” I looked at myself and said, “I'm wrong. I'm bad. Something's wrong with me. I can't be consistent with this plan or I probably wasn't consistent enough, because they told me that if I did it this way it would work, and it didn't work for me so, I'm wrong.” Versus, “Hey, that program might not be best for me.” I feel like we're so, me especially like I'm perfectionist, in general.
We don't look at the outside to be like, “Hey, something might be up with that.” We look at ourselves and like, “We're wrong. We're bad. Something's wrong with us.” And I don't think that that's helpful.
Lauren: Yeah, and then, what changed for you finding Human Design? And can you talk through the transformation, for lack of a better word, or transition for you?
Lauren A: Yeah, I can definitely go into that. So, Human Design is how we're energetically wired to interact with the world around us. And so, I realized when I stumbled upon Human Design and I pulled my chart, I was like, “I have no idea what this means.” And I went down a huge rabbit hole of what is Human Design. And I found out that I am a projector type. So, there's over two billion configurations of Human Design. But at the highest level, there are five types.
And so, I found out I was a projector. It's like, “Okay. Well, what the heck does that mean?” And so, then diving deeper into that, finding out, okay, well projectors are actually designed to work and then, rest. And we're designed to wait for the invitation versus initiate. And so, all of this action that I had been taking in this launch plan was all around initiating and all-around telling my audience what to do and the five easy steps to whatever.
But that tactic based on what I was reading about Human Design and my design as a projector those didn't align. So, it was the first time that I had looked at a program that I had taken and I had spent a ton of money on. And I was so excited about. It was going to be the thing that worked because that's always everyone's marketing. It's like, “This is the only thing you need. This is the best.”
Lauren: The last course you'll ever purchase.
Lauren A: Right. Oh, my gosh. How many times? And I've purchased more courses than the last course. That's their marketing. And so, you buy into that and then, recognizing, “Oh, my gosh, if this is true. If Human Design is accurate and this is the way that I'm meant to move through the world, these actions that I'm taking are completely out of alignment, not resonant frequencies, of what will actually work for me and my energy.”
So, I have been killing myself. And I use the word try because I've been trying so hard. And tried to me means tirelessly resisting yourself, T-R-Y, tirelessly resisting yourself. So, I've been tirelessly resisting myself. And what I felt good and natural and I was being pulled towards and opted for this thing that someone else told me to do because I was convinced that it was the right thing.
So, opting out of that was the transformation. Opting out of all of these things that I'm being told were the only things, the things, that I needed to do and actually taking my power and discernment back which I'm getting chills all over my body saying that which I normally, yeah, I normally do when things are deeply like, “Oh, the truth and resonance,” because I feel like especially during that time when I was purchasing all of these things, I was giving my power away to these programs and these people who had developed things that, hey, they work for some people, and that's amazing.
But to take the power back for myself and to say like, “Is this true for me, and will this work for me?” And yes, you're going to make me want it with your psychology and your marketing. I get it, but being able to take that power back and use my Human Design Authority which is an element of Human Design which basically tells us it's our decision-making strategy. What is correct for us, and it's always in our body and not in our mind.
And so, for me to say, “Okay, mind-wise, this program makes a lot of sense for me to take. I'm thoroughly, psychologically convinced.” But through my authority, my decision-making strategy, my body is telling me this is not correct for me. And so, I could not shame and guilt myself for not being consistent with that program to keep going in that program and keep doing all these actions that weren't actually working for me and were never going to work for me.
It was not that the more that I did, then they were going to work. And so, I shifted all of that action and that energy into things that were more aligned with my type, that were more aligned with my authority, that I could actually get on board with and that were aligned for me. And I worked so much less.
I hated working so much less. I was like, “Oh, this is just what entrepreneurship is. This is just constantly guilting yourself into doing the things that you need to do in order to make money.” That's gross.
Lauren: Why are we doing entrepreneurship then?
Lauren A: Right, why would anyone sign up for this? And also, when you talk about the frequencies, what frequency are you putting out? What seeds are you planting? If you're planting seeds of frustration and force, the fruit that grows off that tree is going to be gross. It's not going to be this lovely delightful delicious fruit of seeds that you planted in delight and success.
Lauren: Yeah, so, then I bet everyone is wondering more about, you've started to talk about authority. So, then they're like, “Okay, so, let's go back to that first thing before we try to slap consistency on it.” What's the root issue? And the root issue is, “How do I decide what things to do for myself?” And you said a little bit about you have this decision-making strategy that is your authority. But can you say a little bit more about that and what making decisions with your authority might look like for a couple of people and before they slap this whole consistency on top of it?
Lauren A: Yeah, we love to talk about so, I'm in the International Human Design Schools. BG5 is the business for Human Design program, and I love the way that they use this language within that program. They say, “It's about the way you enter into things.” And I just really love that because when you're already in something, you've already made the decision. You're already in it, and you're like, “Okay, well I have to be “consistent” with it.” I need to keep doing it. I need to make this decision. But if you backed up, why did you say yes to doing that thing in the first place?
Lauren: I feel like I've been asking clients that all week this week. How did you make the decision in the first place?
Lauren A: Yeah, did you logic yourself into that because you can literally logic yourself into or out of any decision. There is enough information out there to make yourself feel or think one way or another to say yes to something or “makes sense.” I love that when people say it. It just doesn't make sense, yeah, okay? What if it didn't need to make sense because that's a mind thing, not a body thing?
So, your decision-making strategy or your authority is what we call it in Human Design, and I just love that language because when you're using your mind, oftentimes, what we do is we give our authority away to someone else, to someone else's decisions, to someone else who's telling us what we need to do. And so, what we do with Human Design authority is we take back our authority. We are the authority of our own lives, and we are making those decisions based on what's correct for us, not what worked for someone else, but what is correct for us.
And so, the way that you do that is it's a body-based feeling. So, there are quite a few different types of decision strategy in Human Design. That's how you get to the two billion configurations. There's a lot of different variations there which is why I think it's so fun to leverage our design. I think it's so fun to experiment with our design which they call Human Design and Experiment because it's not another box, and we're then going to put ourselves in like, “Oh, I have to do it this way or else I'm wrong.” It's really about listening to our body and not our minds. So, do you want me to give a couple of examples of authorities?
Lauren: Yeah, sure. You could give ours if that's the easiest.
Lauren A: I love it. So, Lauren is splenic or splenic. I've heard it pronounced both ways.
Lauren A: I have no idea what it actually is, so not talking about the body part here, people. But basically what it is as we call it in the Human Design School, the instinctive knowing function. So, what this spleen is in charge of for somebody who has splenic or splenic authority when you pull your chart on mybodygraph.com, you need your birth time. You can look at your chart. Go to the info tab. Don't look at the picture. You're going to have no idea what the heck you are looking at and look for authority or inner authority.
And so, for splenic people, splenic people, what that really looks like is this instinctive knowing. And I know you've heard if you're listening to Lauren's podcast, you've heard her say, “I just know.” You've heard her say, “It didn't make sense, but I knew I had to do it.” You've heard her say like, “I listen to my inner voice.” Inner voice is such a beautiful modality for people who have splenic authority and emotional, but basically any authority. But I won't go into that.
So, splenic is really this instinctive knowing that something is correct for you, and it speaks quietly in the moment and some people experience it as all over body chills. And some people experience it as a quiet whisper. Some people experience it as an inner knowing. And likely, I love to use this example. Taylor Swift is a splenic projector. So, she has splenic authority. And I love to think about the song like, ” I knew you were trouble when you walked in. Shame on me now.” She knew in that moment, in that decision-making time when she entered into something, that person was wrong for her. But she went ahead and did it anyways.
And so, it's often easier for splenic people to look back and say, “Oh, yeah I knew a time I didn't listen,” versus to be like, “I don't know. I don't know how it talks to me.” It's like you do when you don't listen to it. Do you want to share, Lauren, before I go into another type how you experience your splenic?
Lauren: Yeah, yeah. So, for me, it's definitely much more of the quiet whisper once very soft. That's what I find inner voice sessions facilitated by somebody else are super helpful for me to be able to hear it because of getting into my body, the breathing, the getting out of the mind is much easier for me to hear it. And also going for walks, getting away from other people's energies, and things like that are super helpful.
And then, for me, my mind wants to a lot of times just come in and rush in and talk over it and then try to logic its way around how that makes sense or doesn't make sense. So, then being aware of that, I can, “Wait, what was the still, calm, inner knowing?” And I definitely resonate with what you said about knowing when I knew things and didn't listen. I think I've talked about it on the podcast the house that I thought I was going to buy. I remember being in it in a specific place when we were seeing the showing, and it said like, “Not this one.”
But then logically though, I was super excited about it and could make it all the things that I wanted. But then, the unfolding of the process to attempt to get the mortgage and everything was super hellish. And I'm thinking about what if I just sort of listened to not this one? What would have happened?
I feel like recently, I've had a lot more learnings of that, starting to see where I heard it and where I listened or doesn't listen. And even one thing that came to my mind while you're talking about that too, is I have a knowing that I really want to invest in style and cultivating my style more and building out my own closet, buying really nice things that I'm really excited about, and they're fun and playing creative and feminine, but intermix and capsule wardrobe-ish and all of that kind of thing.
Right, yeah. And I was just talking to my mastermind coach about this, this morning. But then, I have this meeting with a stylist next week. And I already know that I'm not meant to do her long package with her. But my mind then is like, “But wait. Why not? If we feel like we're supposed to be investing in these things, we should just do it and make it work? And I've had that a lot with providers where I'm like, “I know I'm meant to do this work or this thing.” But then, my inner voice or my spleen is telling me, “But not this person.” And it's been really hard for my mind to deal with that.
Lauren A: I love your mind.
Lauren: I know. Goldie.
Lauren A: Goldie. She really wants to hold on, and all of our minds do, right? All of our minds have something to say about the decisions that we're making. And so, I think that it's really important too when we talk about the way that we're entering into things. And I think what's really important something that Lauren said in the beginning of the episode is we can use that against ourselves too.
So, to not use it against ourselves and be like, “Okay, well now that I know this, I'm literally going to overhaul my entire life over this weekend. I'm going to get rid of every single thing I've ever done in my business, my coaching thing in my life, my relationship. I'm going to divorce my husband because it wasn't a splenic yes. And I'm just going to start over.” That's not helpful. So, where can we baby step that and almost create a line in a sand and say, “Okay,” instead of looking backwards and being like, “Oh, my gosh, I said yes to all of these things that probably weren't in alignment,” and undoing your whole life, can you just draw a line in the sand of knowing like, “Okay, now I know this is the way that my body communicates to me. This is what my authority looks like, and I'm going to say yes to only the things,” if you're willing to do the experiment, right? If you're willing. “Only yes to things that are correct for me based on my authority and move forward from here.”
And yes, that might mean that there are some things that you're following through within this 3D reality that you're like, “Why did I say yes to this?”
Lauren: Not that I've had any of this. I've had so many of those working with Lauren where I'm like previous me committed to this thing. And now, I know it wasn't a splenic yes. And here we are having to finish out the contract. And sometimes, I don't. But sometimes, I do feel like I'm meant to, “Okay, you committed to this. You're going to finish it,” but yeah.
Lauren A: And even that is a perfect example like, “You're committed to this, you're going to finish it.” That can still be a splenic knowing. And it's like, “Am I meant to stop this?” You can ask again. It might be, “Yeah, it feels like you should, “should.” Hate the word should, but your body is telling you, yes to complete that. But if it's like, “No, get out,” those are the things that you're like, “Oh, no, but I already committed.” It's like, “Okay, can you find a graceful way to exit?”
Lauren: Yeah, and I've done both, and it's been fun to kind of see both and how that works and how I can survive even if I finish the thing because I think also the mind can come in there and be like, “Okay, so then if it was a splenic yes, we have to go all or nothing and then quit all the things,” like you were talking about. And then, it just makes lots of drama.
I'd love to hear more about your authority and how it works and then some examples of things that have been meant for you or not meant for you and how that's played out for you too.
Lauren A: Yeah, so I'm a self-projected projector. So, fun Human Design fact. The way that we usually describe our design when you're in the know is you do your profile lines which we haven't even talked about, your authority and then your type. So, I'm a 5/1 self-projected projector. LC, want to say yours?
Lauren: I'm a 2/4 splenic projector.
Lauren A: There we go. Projectors unite. So, mine is I'm a self-projected projector. So, self-projected is my authority, and what that really looks like and feels like is I have to talk things out. I have to talk out my decisions. And so, I'm going to not go into the mechanics of that because I'm going to go down a way rabbit hole. Usually, what that looks is I need to talk things out in order to make my decision, and it's not that I need someone else to tell me, “Oh, yeah. You should just do this,” like I'm asking someone for advice. But it's more like I need a sounding board or someone to be there to be like, “Hey, what I'm hearing you say is this,” and reflecting back to me or, “Hey, your energy really shifted when you said this.”
Oftentimes, I could feel it for myself now. But in the beginning, I couldn't really tell when something was a yes for me or a no for me. So, literally what I do, and a lot of people have different ways of experiencing this, right? So some people are like, “Yeah, I just talked to a teddy bear, and I can come up with the answer for that way.” And I'm like, “Oh, no. I need another human.” I voxered myself for a while. That didn't work either. It's really experimenting with what does that feel like.
So, for me, I literally love and can feel it best when I talk out both options. So, I can give a really silly example because I think the silly examples are the best because it really shows how clear it works. My fiancé and I were at Costco. And I wanted to get an iPad, and they have great deals on iPads and iPad pencils and all the things. And I was at Costco. And I was standing there just looking at it, like right mind, mind decisions. I was comparing the gigabytes and the Air versus the regular and all this stuff and really in a mental decision.
And so, I asked my fiancé. I was like, “Okay, I want to talk this out real quick,” and he's like, “Oh, my gosh.” And he's the most investigator like, “Let me find all the details of all of the things and then make a logical decision person ever.” So, he's getting used to this. So, I would talk about, “Okay, I want this iPad.” And then, I would talk it all out. And then, I would talk about the iPad Pro. And I would talk it all out. And I thought mind thought I wanted the iPad Pro because it's a better iPad.
Lauren: Right? The Pro. Got to be Pro.
Lauren A: Pick the best one. Of course, I want the best one because I'm one of those people who orders the most expensive things on a menu. It's just like I always want the most expensive thing. It's a character flaw, not really. So, I was like, “Of course, I want the iPad Pro.” But it's an experiment. I'm going to talk it out and see what comes out of my mouth. And when talking about the iPad Pro, my energy kind of was [noise]. If we're going to give a verbal kind of noise to that because self-projected is all about the noise. It's all about the voice. It's all about what comes out of your mouth. You need to release it.
And so, for the regular iPad for me, it was [noise]. It went up. My voice went up. My chest expanded. I was like, “Oh, yeah, I want the regular one.” And Jeremy's like, “What? This is such a better iPad. Why don't you want this one?” It's like, “I don't know,” but my authority, my decision-making strategy, my body is telling me that I want this one, and that's the answer. So, that's a really silly example. But it works for so many different things.
For example, within my coaching business, I only take three clients a quarter, three or four. It's usually three. And so, with that, there's a lot of discernment that needs to happen like, “Who do I actually want to work with for this amount of time? Who do I want to have in my energy? Who do I want to lead and guide? Do they really recognize me to do that?”
And so, just even talking out the people like, “What would this experience be like working with this person and hearing my voice get like, ‘Oh, my gosh I'm so excited’ to help them with this versus I could really help them do this.” It doesn't make logical sense. It doesn't have to make logical sense. I think the really big thing for any authority is when you're talking about your decision. If you notice yourself saying, “So that” or “because,” you are now in your mind.
Lauren: Hello, mind.
Lauren A: Hello, mind. Welcome to the party. You are more than welcome to hang out, but you have no say in this decision.
Lauren: Yeah. Oh, my gosh. It's so good. I love it. Is there anything else that you wanted to say about consistency?
Lauren A: Oh, my gosh. There's so much. But to bring it back to consistency in the authority is can you be consistent with the things that your authority tells you are correct for you? And can you redefine consistency because consistency to one person is different than consistency to another. And again, this goes back to energetics and how we're made up because let's, for example, talk about projectors. Lauren and I are both projectors. Whoo-hoo. We're the best.
Lauren: Obviously, we love you all.
Lauren A: We love you all. So, here's the thing. Projectors are about 20% of the population. So, it is really exciting when you're meeting other projectors. You're like, “Your experience of the world is very similar to my experience in the world,” which is very different than 70% of the population which is the generator or manifesting generator.
So, a lot of society is set up for generators and manifesting generators who have consistent access to go, go, go, do, do, do energy. They have consistent access to a center within their design and energy center which is responsible for the energy resource, the go, the do, the create, the drive, creativity all of that is in the sacral center. And so, they have consistent access to go, go, go, do, do, do which is amazing, and projectors, manifesters, and reflectors, three other types. The three other types do not have consistent access to that sacral center. We have inconsistent access to it. So, when we talk about consistency, literally within our design is inconsistency. And that's not bad or wrong. It's different. So, I can keep going with that, or I can pause.
Lauren: You can keep going.
Lauren A: I'm going to get on my soapbox, Lauren. But, yeah. I just think that there's just a different definition of consistency just there's a different definition of success for people. There's a different definition of consistency. So, for me, being consistent doesn't look the same as it might look for a generator. So, once I've entered into something correctly for my authority, this is where we're going to start. And then, okay. What does consistency look like for me?
Well, for Lauren to me, it looks like there's other elements of my design. I have gate 15 which I'm totally going to go down a rabbit hole here, people. If you want to know more, just message me. I have gate 15 and I also have a right-facing arrow when it comes to where we create structure. So, I'm really more of a flowy type of person who loves extremes.
So, for a couple of days, I might be, “All in on a morning routine.” And then, for three weeks later, not touch anything that I did for those three days. And you know what that means nothing about me, and that's okay. And I'm going to stay in my vibrational frequency of success regardless of what my morning looks like. So, I think for projectors, it's really interesting too, allowing ourselves we're designed to work and then rest and then work and rest. It's not this consistent access. So, what does the consistency look like for a projector? Well, it could look like you consistently honor your body instead of consistently do this action like posting on Instagram. I don't think I posted on Instagram in two months. I post on stories every day. I haven't posted a post in two months. I'm doing just fine. Thank you.
Lauren: I know. All these marketing shoulds that we come up with because I feel like so many, especially, I think the consistency thing is especially prevalent in entrepreneurship and coaching industry around marketing. It might not just be that. But for me, it keeps coming to my mind around marketing, and that people and routines and stuff like that like you were talking about like morning routines like marketing. And there's these almost threats that if you don't consistently market the exact same way day in, day out, or monthly, or whatever, send X number of emails, posts, podcasts, whatever that then you're not going to be able to create the revenue you want to create.
Lauren A: And what that brings up for me is that works for those marketers when their clientele are making decisions with their mind when they have been psychologically influenced to purchase that way. And I don't know about you, but I desire to have a business where I only want to work with people that truly energetically within their bodies know that it's correct to work with me, and consistently beating over someone over the head with a message is not the energy that exchanges for me, and it might be for someone else listening, and that's great.
But it's the way you're entering into that. So, it doesn't feel correct for me. So, I'm not going to do it. I'm not going to opt into that. But it doesn't mean no one should be consistent ever. It's like, “What does consistency mean for you? And what are you entering into?”
Lauren: And can even how you define consistency in different seasons even be, I've been really playing with that in my business. What would it look like to have a business that is more cyclical around my female cycle and is more cyclical around the seasons? And what if we had the team only working? I've said this in a lot of podcasts recently. I'm like, “What if we had the team in the summer only working four days a week so they can have three-day weekends in the summer when it's beautiful and people want a vacation anyway?” And that's so much more fun for me. And what you were talking about two of the different extremes or whatever.
And for me too, I have this ebb and flow with my profile to rabbit hole again for people, make them wonder about their design. But going between being more hermit, wanting to just cuddle up, read a book, and study something exciting to me. And then, between my four of where I want to network and be around the people and I'm really excited to get out there and do that.
And there's this flow in between both of that. And then, the same thing with being a projector like working and then resting, and ebbing and flowing, and in and out, I really think, is beautiful. And then, even the moon cycle that reflects that as well.
Lauren A: Yeah, and talk about reflectors, reflectors are 1% of the population. And literally, their consistency is they're consistent with being fluid. That is what they're designed to be consistent with. They're reflecting everyone that they're around. And so, that definition of what is consistency mean to me? What consistency feels good? How does it feel good? I especially love that piece around cycles because I feel like so often, especially in the marketing the consistency conversations are being led and driven by men who have a very daily cycle.
Lauren: Yeah. That's where I think a lot of the consistency we think it means in a 24-hour period or in a seven-week period when really, we could say that we're super consistent if we zoom out and see a more, I don't know, what is that grander picture or whatever foot view of somebody's life. The amount of times that they do certain things might be super packed into one section for me during more of the ovulation period. I want to get out there and be more social. And then, during other periods, I want nothing to do with it. But I'm still consistent even within that though in a lot of things.
Lauren A: Yeah, within a month versus within a week or within a day.
Lauren: Or even in a year. We consistently maybe will offer something. I mean if we do still kind of the launch model, maybe we do consistently offer once a quarter a thing. But it's not like we're consistently offering it every single week or every single month. So yeah. I think redefining consistency in a way that really serves you is what I would love to offer to those listening, and that maybe learning your Human Design to know what is really meant for you within your body and your energy. And how do you enter into things? I feel that's been such a conversation recently with my clients because we're coaching on an issue or a struggle after things have been entered into. But they may have been entered into without consulting their authority or their body or their inner voice.
Lauren A: Oh yes, and I loved what you said about the year. And then, that made me think about like, “Okay, what does the ten-year view even look like?” Maybe, there was a year of a season of all these offers and pushing out all this stuff and so much growth. And then, the next year looks like a lot of inner reflection and getting your systems in order. And then, the next year looks like, and then, a whole lifetime. Yeah, you were consistent.
Lauren: Yeah, I totally agree. And I really love I've mentioned on the podcast too. Dan Sullivan has this framework of the 25-year Framework where he has everyone zoom out even more to what if we're looking at a 25-year span of time rather than just these really quick 90-day or five-year plans or whatever. And I think that's really fun to play with that in your mind too. I feel like that's true though in our community that there's not really the glorification of having different years like that like foundational or stabilizing years versus growth years, and that there's just this pressure that folks put on the community that every year should be this rapid transformation growth year.
Not that we can't have quantum leaps and do things like that. But I do feel like I really want to be more of an example of slower, more sustainable growth and not necessarily just forcing the next level of revenue so that we can play with those energies of consistency the way we want to have consistency.
Lauren A: Yeah, that's so important too because what you were saying about those year over year like having a growth year and then having a building year or stabilizing year, but the messaging that we're getting is all about being consistent and growing year over year. And so, again, that sends home a message that there's something wrong with you. And if you're doing a lot of inner work or having a baby or traveling the world like consistency for the sake of consistency looks like you're not living your life a lot of the times. It's like, “What are you doing? Why are you in business in the first place?”
And I'm seeing that all over the place. Women that are so successful and so smart and so powerful and have these amazing lives, and they're in a year that really looks like what do I want and re-establishing what are their desires and then having their mind kind of beat them up because they're not being consistent or they're not growing fast enough. Growing fast enough compared to who? What expectation did you set for yourself? And what does consistency mean?
Lauren: Yeah, I just read this book called Rest. And in this book, he also talks about sabbaticals. There's a whole chapter on sabbaticals, and it talks about this one. I don't know what he did for a living. I forget. But he owned some agency or company, and he just completely would shut it down on a consistent basis. I think it was every seven years or something like that for the whole year, he wouldn't work or do anything and just took the whole year off, and he would always come back from that, and his business would double every single time.
Lauren A: Oh my gosh.
Lauren: Because he would always have the most creative ideas when he was just out in the world playing in between these stints. And I thought that was such a fun example too of how he was consistent on this grander scale, but not necessarily every year doing the same things.
Lauren A: Oh, that's so good. My little projector heart loves the concept of a sabbatical.
Lauren: Mine too. I was telling a boyfriend two or three years ago, I was like, “All I want is a sabbatical.” I wish I could take a sabbatical.
Lauren A: Especially if we're not acting projectors, and we're being generators.
Lauren: Yes, that's what I was doing. And I was like, “Please, make it stop.” Now, my craving for a sabbatical is much less. But I still think that's really fun, and that's what I've been wondering. And I think some have heard this on the podcast, is if I'm not in such a rush to create retirement money or I was super into the financial independence retire early community, so, I was in this rush to create all this wealth that's going to pay me to be able to stop working by 40. But then, I'm creating a life now that I don't even like. And what if I could just create an amazing life that includes generating of income on this more long-term scale, and we can just settle in and slow down?
Lauren A: Oh, that feels so good. I have a friend who saw a financial advisor when she first went into her corporate job. She was two years in, and she finally saw a financial advisor because she was putting away all of this money for retirement because it's what she'd been taught to do by her parents. And the financial advisor said something to her, and she's like, “Oh.” He said, “Future Ashley, is going to be really happy. But how is current, Ashley?” Because she's living in this shoebox. She's not doing any of the things she wants to do. She's not taking any vacations. Who are you living for here?
Lauren: Yeah, and that's really how I was being as well for a while. And I am now kind of recalibrating and re-shifting, and that's really fun to play with too. Well, it's been so fun to chat with you about all of this, Lauren. If people want to find you or learn more about their Human Design or you want to leave them with something, what do you want to say?
Lauren A: Oh, gosh. You gave back the self-projector the mic. So, watch out. I don't know. So, this is my favorite thing to geek out on, and this was really fun to play with it from how does Human Design actually apply to your life perspective and how do you really leverage it because there's a lot of things in life where we can just learn it. And learning is wonderful. But we're no longer in the information age, in my opinion. We're in the integration age. What are you living? What are you learning? What are you sharing? What are you embodying?
And so, if you want to learn more about your design, if you want to start experimenting with it, you want to start playing with it, the place that you get a chart is mybodygraph.com. You can fill out the information there, and you'll get your design. That's not my site. But it's free. You just need to give your email address. There’s lots of different places to do it. But that's the easiest kind of one to explain.
And then, if you'd like to find me or figure out how to work with your chart a little bit deeper and learn a little bit more, I'm on Instagram at, my gosh I hate my handle, but there's nothing available that remotely relates to my name.
Lauren: We'll also put it in the show notes.
Lauren A: Yeah, put it in the show notes, @_laurenearmstrong_. And I also have a free class where I talk about how to play your chart and what are all the five types, and we talk a little bit about frequency and showing up as your ideal self and your unapologetic self within your business. And what that looks like. And I will have, Lauren, link it in the show notes for you.
Lauren: Awesome. Love it. Thanks, Lauren. And I hope you all enjoyed our conversation. Talk to you next week. Bye.
Hey, there. Thanks so much for listening. I wanted to invite you if you are ready to integrate what you're learning on this podcast and want to dive deeper you must come check out Cultivate Margin. It's my coaching program that's a hybrid between a self-study course and a coaching program designed just for you. Join me in the community of others like you at vivere.co/margin and you can get that link in the show notes as well. I can't wait to see you in there. Have an amazing day.
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