The Ease of Hustle Podcast
22. Now What?
You've decided on your goal. Awesome! Then you start looking at what you need to do to carry out your goal.
You want to be the person who does what they say they are going to do this time and carry it out. Are you planning with the right mindset? What do you tell yourself when you haven't hit a result you've wanted?
If you are planning for a launch or a goal, there are 3 moments you want to be mindful of if you are doing thought work around being someone who does what they say they are going to do. There is one moment that is the most important. Join me as I give you insights on what to be mindful of as you are creating and carrying out your goals in your business and your life.
What You'll Learn From This Episode:
- What the 3 moments are when you are carrying out your goal or result
- How you can be creative when you are carrying out your goal or result and align it to how you want to live your life
- Questions you can ask yourself while you are in each moment to gain awareness
- Examples of what each moment looks like
- What the most important moment is out of the 3 moments
- How to let go of self-judgment
Listen to the Full Episode:
22. Now What?
Full Episode Transcript:
Hey, good morning. Happy Monday. How are you doing? It's been a while since I've recorded. You don't know that because you've been listening every week, but a little behind-the-scenes. I told you I've been batch recording and I did batch record through the last podcast episode before I moved, so I just recently moved to Nevada and I am loving it so much. The mountains are beautiful. It's a lot colder here than I realized it is in the wintertime. I know it gets super hot here and I'm used to that, but I'm not used to the desert getting so cold. It does get cold in Palm Desert. I went to high school in Palm Desert by Palm Springs. It did get cold there, but I don't remember it getting as cold as it's been getting here, but I've been loving it. I love the house that I'm in.
And so I'm recording this in a brand new space and I'm recording it, sitting in a brand new chair. I finally got a chair that's more supportive to my body, and I also just got a new mic, because I was not loving the mic situation previously. So now I have a new mic, a new boom, and now I just need to figure out how to manage all of the cords, and my dad is really good at doing them. So we'll see if I'm able to make it happen before he comes. But when he comes to visit, he for sure we'll have another desk cord management project on his hands, but he always does an amazing job. I feel like if he ever needs another entrepreneurial endeavor himself, he could go into creating the most beautiful cord management service and company.
Anyway, I also wanted to tell you that we just launched what I'm calling The Mentorship. And if you didn't hear about it, that means that we are not connected on anything other than you listening to this podcast, which is super amazing that you're doing that. Thank you. Hi, I'm glad we're podcast friends and I'm speaking into your ears right now. However, you might miss out on things sometimes. Sometimes I come up with ideas and we talk about them in places that are not on this podcast. So if you want to be in the loop for those things, make sure you are on my email list. And I'm going to tell you at the end about an amazing free resource to get on the email list. But also throughout this podcast, I have lots of different opt-ins and resources available for you that will help you get on the list.
But if you want to get on the list right now before you forget, go to vivere.co/email and pop in your email there, you'll get the free guide. I'll tell you about it at the end of this episode. And you'll be on the list for all future announcements because The Mentorship is going to be amazing. It is meant for those coaches who are already LCS certified. LCS, meaning The Life Coach School, certified. If you don't know what that is, I was certified and master coach certified by The School. And I am taking a bunch of, well, not really a bunch, a small group of folks that were already certified through The School and taking them through a really in-depth mentorship program to help them take their coaching to the next level and develop their coach-client relationships, get coaching around that, have more awareness around that, be able to use my tools, the things I've developed, the way that I coach that can interweave it with their own unique ways of coaching and I want to be able to help more people. So that means I need more people helping me coach all of you.
So exciting things coming, get ready for that if you've been dying to work with me or work with somebody using the tools that I use. It is coming. We're preparing for so many amazing things right now in my company. And I can't wait to share them with you all. So stay tuned for that. Make sure you're on the list and you can always engage with me on Instagram too. I like to post there day-to-day things at Vivere Co.
Alright, so before we head into today's show, I want to give a review shout out. And if you want your review shouted out and your name to be mentioned on the podcast, make sure you go to vivere.co/review, and you will be on the list for us to shout you out. So this review is from Okie2006 and the title is “Short, Powerful Podcast. These are the perfect length podcasts to get short, helpful hints, to apply to life immediately. I really enjoy listening to Lauren and find her podcast very helpful.” Well, thank you. Super sweet of you. And I appreciate all the reviews that helps others find podcasts like this one. So feel free to leave a review to support the podcast and to help other entrepreneurs like yourself, find the podcast.
Alright, so let's head into today's episode. Today, we're going to talk about the only moment that really matters. Before we talk about that moment, we're going to talk about three separate moments that I've been noticing recently in a lot of my coaching with my clients, especially around calendar management, time management or what we call time management, around goal setting, around launches, anything where there's a before moment, where you are setting the goal, planning a future thing, planning your week on your calendar. Whatever that is I want you to think about that right now. There's that first planning moment there. The before moment, where you are doing a process or you are making decisions that then will impact what you have placed on the calendar, what you have decided your steps for a goal will be. And if you're following Monday Hour One, the process I co-developed with Brooke Castillo and Tyson Bradley, you will be putting the steps for that goal onto your calendar to make it as good as done.
Also, same thing with a launch. Let's say you're planning a launch. As you're planning it, you're breaking all the steps down for the launch, deciding how long each step you're going to give it. I almost say how long you're going to take with each step, but I don't like that language because the steps don't take time from us. Things don't take time from us. I was just talking to someone on Instagram about this because I put out there that I'm going to be doing a time management series on this podcast, which I hate the term time management because I don't believe that time is something we “manage” but for lack of a better term, I'm going to be going into that soon here. So stay tuned, get excited.
And they were talking about how they believed that time could be taken from someone. Even in our DM conversation, they were saying that they felt bad for taking my time or they didn't want to take my time, or they didn't want to get some casual DM coaching from me because it would be taking my time. And no one can ever take my time. Time is not something to be taken. I create my time in my own mind. And I'm willing to teach you more about that in the time management series, but I decide how I'm going to be in every moment. If I'm going to interact with someone in a DM, or if I'm not going to do that, that's up for me to decide. They don't get to decide that for me. I am an adult. I'm an autonomous adult, and I get to decide how I use my time, how I use my energy, all of these things, and how much I create more of it or drain more of it based on what I'm thinking and the way I live my life.
So anyway, that was a tangent. Let's go back and talk about these three moments. So if you're planning something, if you have a goal, a launch, etc., there are three moments to be mindful of if you are doing the inner work or thought work around being somebody who does what they say they do, being somebody who follows their calendar, being somebody who creates goals that they set, who has amazing launches. Whatever it is, whoever you want to become, there's these three moments that are really beautiful to look at for doing that, for becoming that person.
So the first moment is what we call the before moment. Or you can also call it the planning moment, or you could also call it the decision-making moment, which we're going to have to do a whole series on decision making because I have some new theories about that, that I want to share. And I will be teaching them more in-depth in my new program that's launching later this year, coming attractions. But there's this moment where we, if you're doing the Monday Hour One process, you're writing down everything that your mind thinks you have to do, and then deciding how long each thing will be on your calendar and then you put it on the calendar. And so if you're doing that, this is where you decide what are the things from that list that are going to be the things for the week.
What are the steps you're going to use to reach your goal? What are the parts of the launch strategy that you're going to choose to put on your calendar to create that launch, to create that goal? There's a lot of decision making there, and we can have a challenging time in that moment, making the best decisions for us, because a lot of thought errors can come up in that moment. We can believe we have to do a lot in order to create the result that we want to create. We might think we're not doing enough. We might be thinking we have to do things like somebody else taught us. Maybe we learned a launch process from another teacher. Maybe we think in order to create a goal, we have to take a certain number of steps and we have to fit it all in somehow into our calendar even though it doesn't seem to jive with the way that we want to live our day-to-day lives. We want the goal so badly that we bend on everything else that we want for our life and think we can't have both.
Things like that come up in the planning moment. And often I find that people are not even mindful in the planning moment. They're not asking themselves questions like what is not meant for me in the season? That's a really good question. Or the opposite of that more positively is what is meant for me this season? And really checking in with, can you check in with your inner knowing? With your inner voice? Like you've heard about us talk about on this podcast in previous episodes. Or are you just listening to the mind's chatter about all of it and not listening to the still small, clear knowing about what is meant for you right now? What is meant for you right now in this moment, in this season is never going to be rushed or hurried. It's never going to be if it's really meant for you. Your desires for how you want to live your life will fit with your desires for what goals you want to create.
They don't have to be this thing that you have to choose between. You don't have to choose between the lifestyle you want to live and the goals you want to create. Of course, they're meant to go together. So in your planning moment, the reason why you haven't been able to figure out how there's actually always plenty of time and that it's not true that there's too much to do and not enough time is because you haven't decided that time is completely created by you and abundant. And there is a solution. There is a creative strategy. It does not mean though that right now, it is possible for you to create what you want to create, trying to keep doing it the same way you've been doing it.
That's what a lot of people come to me with is like, “I keep trying to fit the square into a round hole and it's not fitting, you're telling me it fits.” And I'm like, “Yes, but I'm telling you not to keep trying to push it in there just that way. We might need to get like a saw or something if it's like a wooden block like we need to get creative. How would we change the situation here?” There are lots of ways to do that with time. There are things like getting support. Doesn't even have to be paid support. There's lots of ways to get support. There's a spectrum of ways to bend time with even like something like meal support. There's a huge spectrum between having a private chef that brings you meals and drops them off for you, with all your dietary specifications, that's what I'm doing recently. And then there's a huge difference, all the way to you, picking, growing, and picking and harvesting and processing the food to then create a meal from scratch, etc.
There's like a wide range of different ways to make sure you and your family or whoever you're responsible for feeding or desiring to feed. There's a huge spectrum of ways that you can do that, that don't have to take a lot of time. There's a lot of pre-prepped things in the grocery stores now, if you have access to that. There are so many creative ways for everything in our lives and our businesses to do in a way that's different than we've been doing. There's a lot of technology. I talk about Text Expander all the time, but basically snippet and text expansion type applications. That's just one example. Zapier or Zapier is another example. ClickUp, other things like this, and integrations of all of them will speed everything up, but you have to slow down to be strategic to then speed up. And that's what a lot of us don't want to do.
I was just coaching a woman yesterday that was talking about how she doesn't want to do the Monday Hour One process, because when she's doing it, she does it for a couple hours, but then she feels like she can never get anything on the calendar or she can't get all of the things she thinks she wants to do that week on the calendar. And then she is frustrated because then she thinks she just lost like two hours that she could have just been getting things done. But the problem with that is then you're never stepping out of your calendar. You're never stepping out of the to-do list to evaluate, and be strategic and figure out how to bend time. What's that actually not even meant for you to do. What's not even meant for anyone to do in your life or in your business. That can be eliminated altogether.
That won't happen if you just stay in the weeds of it all. You have to slow down before you can speed up. I've been doing a lot of slowing down in my company recently to then speed up. I've been slowing down to get more support, to train more support, to redo our backend systems so that we can scale. We've been redoing a lot of that. I haven't been offering anything at least publicly that I'm selling for a long time. At least that's what my mind and a lot of people have told me because I had such high demand that I needed to retool everything so that I can start to meet that demand at a higher level.
So the same thing might happen for you in your life. If you cannot meet the demand of your life or your business, it might be a sign that that's the time to start slowing down, going inward, and retooling and reconfiguring before you're able to speed back up. And a lot of you are not going to want to do that. A lot of my clients that I'm helping scale from six to seven figures or seven figures, and beyond, they don't want that. They want it all fixed right now. And I do too. Like in my own business, I see so many things that are not the way that I want them to be. A lot of things are so messy and are without SOPs because we just changed platforms. I don't like any of it, but I also know this is exactly the process. This is what we're meant to be doing. This is a part of all of it.
And so there's that planning moment, the strategic moment, where if we just slowed down in the beginning, we won't then be making decisions that aren't meant for us that then we end up paying the consequences for later. And then having to maybe decide to not do a thing or maybe deciding that we're just going to muscle our way through it and be exhausted or burn ourselves out, or be in an energy deficit because we took on things that weren't meant for us.
So the next moment, the second moment of the three that we're going to talk about is there is the in the moment, moment, the now moment, the moment when, if you're using the calendering process, it comes up on your calendar, it's a Wednesday at 6:00 AM and you are meant to record a podcast. You chose to record a podcast. It says record episode. It really says Episode 22 recorded, because we write things in past tense and you go to do that and your mind has all the drama. It's like, “I don't want to record a podcast right now. I still am tired. I haven't had coffee yet. I want to, but I also don't want to. And it's just a lot. What if I don't know what to say? What if I forget some of the examples I wanted?”
And then you have the temptation to push it off. And sometimes you're meant to. Like yesterday I was going to record this podcast and my body decided it was not going to record the podcast because I was having a very painful period situation. So I decided I was not meant to record it then. I also had planned to record this podcast like a week and a half ago because I'm planning on batching all my podcasts and doing it around better times in my cycle, and obviously that also did not happen. And it's not because I was procrastinating against myself. It was just because the move did not go the way that I had planned, and I did not have my new mic yet. I also did not have a desk set up or any way of really recording well, so I decided it was not time yet.
But here we are recording now. So you have the in the moment decision and sometimes the in the moment decision is not to actually do the thing, but you have to be really honest with yourself. Where's that coming from? Is that coming from your inner knowing and wisdom that it's not time right now? Or is it, and usually this is the case for a lot of people I work with, or is it that you're actually afraid of getting your thing out there or you're being too overly perfectionistic? So you're perfecting, perfecting, perfecting, and never finishing the thing. And you're expanding the amount of time you're working on something. Is that what's happening in the moment? Be really curious about what your mind is offering you right there in the moment. So that's the second moment. So we had the first moment, the before moment, the second moment, the during moment.
And then we have the after moment. Now, I love the after moment. I love all the moments. The after moment is a beautiful moment. This is where all the juiciness comes in, especially for those of you who tend to have perfectionistic thinking. You will tend to do the layering of the negative self-judgment, the negative self-talk in the after moment. And if you're doing that, you won't be opening yourself up to be curious about our before moment or the during moment at all. You'll just be completely wrapped into your mind's beliefs about how bad you are, how terrible you are, what a procrastinator you are, how you're never going to get the goal, that you might as well, throw it out even though it's January 15th. All of this comes in the after moment.
The after moment happens, whether you did the thing or didn't do the thing, whether you have the goal yet, or you don't have the goal yet. It's when you're evaluating and often the negative self-talk though comes up around you didn't get the thing the way that you were planning on, i.e., you had planned this week that you would have four consults, but now it's Sunday night, you didn't have four consults. You had two. Now, here we are in the moment after. What are you going to make that mean? The two out of four? Are you going to make it mean anything about you? Are you going to make it mean anything about your ability to still hit your goal for the month, for the year, for the century? Are you going to layer on negative self-judgment to that? Are you just going to throw out setting goals and decide, “Well, this doesn't feel good. So next week, whatever, we're just going to do whatever, not set a goal, not create consults on purpose. Maybe if they come, that's cool, but I'm not going to go after it.”
What happens in that after a moment when you don't follow your calendar, the way that you had thought you had planned on? Do you think, “Well, then there's no way I'm going to get this project done. My book's not going to be written. I'm such a procrastinator. I can't trust myself. I never do what I say I'm going to do. My mom was right.” What's the conversation in the after? Whatever just happened. You are not following the calendar block and doing something else. You are not making the dollars that you thought your company would make this month. Whatever it is, it was not a bad thing. Your mind is thinking it's a bad thing. And then it's layering on also, and this bad thing means something bad about us. Let's layer on the negative self-judgment.
But first of all, that thing wasn't a bad thing. You had two consults last week. That's not a problem. That could be something amazing. You're getting two consults. You just need to double that. So how would you double down on the things creating the two consults? Were you fully believing that you would have four? Probably not. There's probably belief work to be done there.
Now, if you start to make it mean something bad about yourself or something that you did a bad thing or that a bad thing happened, and you make it mean that you're not going to create what you want to create, then you for sure won't create that because of what you're thinking now in the after moment, not because you created two consults and you were wanting to create four. This is the moment everyone, that you make or break what you want to create in your life. This one, right here. Yes, all three moments are really important, but if you just focus in on this after moment and decide to make it all mean that you're right on track, that you're still creating what you want to create, and that you are on your way, you're in the journey of it. You will create it as long as you don't give up on it. You will.
So I want to invite you this week to start noticing these three moments and especially start to notice this after moment. It's where all the juiciness is, where all of the curiosity is helpful. What is the story you're telling yourself? Are you're telling yourself the bad thing happened and then telling yourself something bad about yourself because the “bad thing” happened? What if you dropped that? What if it weren't anything about you? What if there was no layering of self-judgment on top? What if you shifted into pure curiosity? And what if the thing wasn't a bad thing? And what if it didn't mean anything about what you can create for yourself? Now what?
Alright, so I want to invite you to download Select All. It's my free guide for opting out of inbox mayhem. My copywriter, who's helping me with new pages for our new website that we're creating, which is super fun, just said that she was reading through it to help me write the like sales page opt-in copy for that. And I'm going to create a free little mini-course version of that, that's coming up that will help you as CEO with your work inbox, your personal inbox, and then also your small team and how to manage email and customer support. And all the email that happens in a business around six figures going to seven. And she had posted on her Instagram that it was so amazing that everyone needed it right now and it helped her think about email in a whole new way.
So if you want to think about email in a whole new way, I invite you to download it at vivere.co/email. You'll grab it there, you'll get the free PDF, and then I will help you create inbox zero and maintain it and think about it in a whole new way.
Thanks so much for listening. Have an amazing week. Talk soon. Bye.
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